In my view I have a perfect relationship with my sister because we both do things for each other that is purely because we care about each other or because we are supporting each other. We do not use each other as a means to an end, but as a means itself. I can’t say that I can give another example of this kind of relationship, but I know of at least one. Sometimes we get angry with each other, but you could not pay me enough money to hurt any member of my family and I think the same goes with my family members. Everyone has relationships where they use one another mutually because that is what friendship is. I love being around my friends, but if they ask for a piece of my sandwich and I’m starving I might not give it to them (it depends on how desperate they look I guess). On the other hand if one of my family members asked for a bite of my sandwich I would fork half of it over. I don’t take any credit for being this way because that is just the way I was raised. Growing up at my house was all about the family. If I asked why I had to give my sister a toy then my mother would say “Because she’s your sister!” (I am the youngest so this usually worked the opposite way, but still).
I have acted out of anger a couple of times because I’m not really an angry person so it doesn’t happen that often, but what I really get defensive about is when people are insulting or belittling those that I love. I distinctly remember a time when I was with my sister in Wales that some Welsh guy was making fun of us Americans and I didn’t really care what he was saying about me, but I could tell that my sister was getting embarrassed so I told the guy flat out that he was being extremely rude and he either should change the subject or he could shut-up and leave. Well he then became really embarrassed and apologized and I realized that I might not have had to yell at him in order to make this change, but he upset me because he was upsetting my sister. People who know me realize that I take jokes well and I don’t get angry, but if the joke goes too far or you are insulting someone I care about deeply then we are going to have a problem. I am not proud of this trait, but neither am I ashamed of it because the people who I tell off are usually the people who are relentlessly hounding someone who is not able or too polite to defend themselves. And I do not like bullies.
